Week 655AZ - Great Kids Lines - Clearance Sale

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For years I’ve been collecting cruft the kids have said to me, here is a dump of it, I’m not even sure when it was said or written, but possibly it’s years old.

Here’s some bonus family pictures too ..

One of Zach’s stories:

Dick van Danger was back. After escaping his prison cell, Dick needed a new image. “I’ve got it! I’ll become… Annoyed Grandpa Hero (A.G.H)!”

Luckily for AGH, he was about to be his first task, tax evasion. AGH’s plan was simple: If there’s no government, how can I be taxed? I CAN’T! AGH used his one superpower, NUKES. You see, AGH can make high powered nukes appear out of thin air. AGH then used his power to blow up the U.S. government.

“AGH, I HATE YOU!” Screamed the U.S. government. “Don’t worry about it.” AGH replied.

Some great lines from Amelia when she was 6

  • (When seeing a dandelion, I told Amelia she could blow it, and make a wish): Dad, I wish for you to be always happy
  • (Seeing Amelia covered in scratches, I asked - “Amelia, why are you covered in scratches”) Dad, that’s what it’s like being a cat owner.
  • I love ice cream but it’s not very healthy so I don’t get it all the time.
  • The are 3 things I’m still planning for the birthday party. 1/ Cookie donut or cupcakes. 2/ what the activity is and 3/ how to get them all to the birthday party since they don’t know where it is.
  • If I don’t get to use my tablet, then I can’t focus, and I won’t be nice.
  • Dad you’re not meditating, your hands and legs aren’t in the right position, which means you can’t get the right vibrations.
  • ( I was talking about boys kissing) Gross, Luckily boys are less into me now. It was annoying at valentines day so many cards, it stuffed up my whole backpack.
  • I need to sit down so I don’t bonk my head. That’s the problem with getting bigger.
  • Dad, sometimes I don’t know if you’re a grownup or a child.

Some Great Lines from Zach

  • Dad, could I get an appetizer, or am I pushing my luck?
  • Well, I guess I could move to Canada, everyone likes Canadians.

Have a great day and remember: _Sometimes you need to do a brain dump, otherwise you can get stuck in a slump.